O povestioara

KORBEN · 18 Nov 2004, 00:44

It is summer, and I am persuaded to take a continental holiday by two enthusiastic acquaintances. Being a creature of habit, I am accustomed to vacations in the seaside resorts near to my home, but the proposition is put in such a way that I find it hard to make excuses.
We depart, and travel by train to Romania, where, after a series of misadventures, we are all captured by Count Dracula, Prince of Darkness. We are taken in a foul-smelling horse-drawn carriage to his castle, which towers blasphemously above the forests, fingering the torn sky with its crumbling turrets. We are, naturally, rent with terror. It is clear that the Count intends to drink our blood, turning us into undead monsters of the night in the process.
We are imprisoned in once luxurious apartments, overlooking Dracula's estate. It is evident that the twentieth century has not treated our host well. Ominously, he tells us in heavily-accented English that he has been forced to open up large tracts of his estate as a theme park, with log flumes, bowling alleys, rollercoasters, and burger bars, all of which are frequented by Western tourists who know nothing of the old ways.
Our sympathy is tempered by the sure knowledge that the Count intends to suck out our souls with his pointy teeth. We secretly devise a daring plan to flee. We encourage the Count to show us round the theme park, and, as we come to the bowling alley, hurl ourselves down the planks into the skittley darkness. We scramble through wires, pipes, and other obstructions until we find ourselves in an area devoted to crazy golf, where we mingle with the tourists. It is with some relief that we exit through the turnstiles. It is easy from thence to find a hire car, and complete our courageous escape.
Back home in Eastbourne, I wonder if we did the right thing. It infuriates me that Dracula may have needed my soul more than I do.

raptor · 19 Nov 2004, 10:34

:lol: .da,ase e....trist,da' asa e.
de unde e chestiuta asta,Korben?

KORBEN · 19 Nov 2004, 19:41

daca nu se bloca pc-ul puneam si linku ca eun site plin....
da asa tre sa intreb pe careva care m`a trimes acoilo
scuze d ortografie
an un deget disfunctional si nici timp sa corectez nu am
salutari

Nae · 19 Nov 2004, 23:02

da... am citi si eu acuma... mi-a placut.
...but in fact, do we need souls for ourselves, or is it something to give-away?

jackpot · 27 Nov 2004, 19:39

CAPITALISM TRADITIONAL
Ai doua vaci. Vinzi una si cumperi un taur. Cireada se inmulteste iar economia prospera. Le vinzi si iesi la pensie cu castigul.

CAPITALISM CORPORATIST (TIP ENRON)
Ai doua vaci. Vinzi trei dintre ele companiei tale listate public, folosind scrisori de credit deschise de cumnatul tau la banca, apoi executi un schimb datorie/creanta cu o oferta generala asociata,astfel incat recapeti cele patru vaci, cu o scutire de taxe pentru cinci vaci.
Drepturile asupra celor sase vaci sunt transferate, printr-un intermediar catre o companie din Insulele Cayman, detinuta in secret de actionarul majoritar, care revinde companiei tale drepturile pentru toate cele sapte vaci. Conform raportului anual, compania detine opt vaci, cu o optiune pentru inca una.
Vinzi o vaca pentru a cumpara un presedinte al SUA, ceea ce te lasa cu noua vaci. Nu se furnizeaza nici o foaie de bilant impreuna cu comunicatul.
Publicul inghite.

COMPANIE AMERICANA
Ai doua vaci. Vinzi una si fortezi pe cealalta sa produca lapte pentru patru. Esti surprins cand vaca moare.

COMPANIE FRANCEZA
Ai doua vaci. Faci greva pentru ca doresti sa ai trei vaci.

COMPANIE JAPONEZA
Ai doua vaci. Le reproiectezi astfel incat sa fie de zece ori mai mici decat o vaca obisnuita si sa produca de douazeci de ori mai mult lapte.
Apoi creezi imagini animate inteligente ale vacii, numite Cowkemon si le promo-vezi la scara globala.

COMPANIE GERMANA
Ai doua vaci. Le reproiectezi astfel incat sa traiasca 100 de ani, sa manance o data pe luna si sa se mulga singure.

COMPANIE BRITANICA
Ai doua vaci. Amandoua sunt nebune.

COMPANIE ITALIANA
Ai doua vaci, dar nu stii unde sunt. Pleci in pauza de pranz.

COMPANIE RUSEASCA
Ai doua vaci. Le numeri si afli ca ai 5 vaci. Le numeri din nou si afli ca ai 42 de vaci. Le numeri din nou si afli ca ai 12 vaci. Te opresti din numarat vaci si deschizi alta sticla de vodca.

COMPANIE ELVETIANA
Ai 5000 de vaci, dintre care nici una nu-ti apartine. Facturezi celorlalti cheltuieli de depozitare.

COMPANIE INDIANA
Ai doua vaci. Te inchini la ele.

COMPANIE CHINEZA
Ai doua vaci. Ai 300 de oameni care le mulg. Declari somaj zero, productivitate bovina inalta si arestezi reporterul care a publicat cifrele.

COMPANIE ROMANEASCA
Ai 6 vaci, costuri cat de 10, mulgi doar 3, alergi bezmetic printre ele, mai aduci personal pentru alte 5, dai faliment si dai vina pe bou.

Jay · 21 Dec 2004, 11:52

Originally Posted by KORBEN:

daca nu se bloca pc-ul puneam si linku ca eun site plin....

Eu inca astept link-ul....

KORBEN · 22 Dec 2004, 02:09

@jackpot
minunata comicaraia

m`am stricat dd ras la faza cu italienii si chinezii

@jay
am plecat din
www.radiohead.com
din pagina cu celelate situri
navigheaza prin ele, in mod sigur gasesti chestii f misto

mai ales pe no data, care are un fel d chestionar genial :w00t:

18 Nov 2004, 00:44	#1
KORBEN Guru Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: deeper underground Posts: 1,428	O povestioara It is summer, and I am persuaded to take a continental holiday by two enthusiastic acquaintances. Being a creature of habit, I am accustomed to vacations in the seaside resorts near to my home, but the proposition is put in such a way that I find it hard to make excuses. We depart, and travel by train to Romania, where, after a series of misadventures, we are all captured by Count Dracula, Prince of Darkness. We are taken in a foul-smelling horse-drawn carriage to his castle, which towers blasphemously above the forests, fingering the torn sky with its crumbling turrets. We are, naturally, rent with terror. It is clear that the Count intends to drink our blood, turning us into undead monsters of the night in the process. We are imprisoned in once luxurious apartments, overlooking Dracula's estate. It is evident that the twentieth century has not treated our host well. Ominously, he tells us in heavily-accented English that he has been forced to open up large tracts of his estate as a theme park, with log flumes, bowling alleys, rollercoasters, and burger bars, all of which are frequented by Western tourists who know nothing of the old ways. Our sympathy is tempered by the sure knowledge that the Count intends to suck out our souls with his pointy teeth. We secretly devise a daring plan to flee. We encourage the Count to show us round the theme park, and, as we come to the bowling alley, hurl ourselves down the planks into the skittley darkness. We scramble through wires, pipes, and other obstructions until we find ourselves in an area devoted to crazy golf, where we mingle with the tourists. It is with some relief that we exit through the turnstiles. It is easy from thence to find a hire car, and complete our courageous escape. Back home in Eastbourne, I wonder if we did the right thing. It infuriates me that Dracula may have needed my soul more than I do. __________________ If I was not me, I would hate me too Just like you do I don't need to need you Tell me what to do, tell me what to say

19 Nov 2004, 10:34	#2
raptor Leprechaun Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 2,535	:lol: .da,ase e....trist,da' asa e. de unde e chestiuta asta,Korben? __________________ absolutely, mr president, absolutely http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=81bQJGafcjU

19 Nov 2004, 19:41	#3
KORBEN Guru Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: deeper underground Posts: 1,428	daca nu se bloca pc-ul puneam si linku ca eun site plin.... da asa tre sa intreb pe careva care m`a trimes acoilo scuze d ortografie an un deget disfunctional si nici timp sa corectez nu am salutari __________________ If I was not me, I would hate me too Just like you do I don't need to need you Tell me what to do, tell me what to say

27 Nov 2004, 19:39	#5
jackpot Guru Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 390	CAPITALISM TRADITIONAL Ai doua vaci. Vinzi una si cumperi un taur. Cireada se inmulteste iar economia prospera. Le vinzi si iesi la pensie cu castigul. CAPITALISM CORPORATIST (TIP ENRON) Ai doua vaci. Vinzi trei dintre ele companiei tale listate public, folosind scrisori de credit deschise de cumnatul tau la banca, apoi executi un schimb datorie/creanta cu o oferta generala asociata,astfel incat recapeti cele patru vaci, cu o scutire de taxe pentru cinci vaci. Drepturile asupra celor sase vaci sunt transferate, printr-un intermediar catre o companie din Insulele Cayman, detinuta in secret de actionarul majoritar, care revinde companiei tale drepturile pentru toate cele sapte vaci. Conform raportului anual, compania detine opt vaci, cu o optiune pentru inca una. Vinzi o vaca pentru a cumpara un presedinte al SUA, ceea ce te lasa cu noua vaci. Nu se furnizeaza nici o foaie de bilant impreuna cu comunicatul. Publicul inghite. COMPANIE AMERICANA Ai doua vaci. Vinzi una si fortezi pe cealalta sa produca lapte pentru patru. Esti surprins cand vaca moare. COMPANIE FRANCEZA Ai doua vaci. Faci greva pentru ca doresti sa ai trei vaci. COMPANIE JAPONEZA Ai doua vaci. Le reproiectezi astfel incat sa fie de zece ori mai mici decat o vaca obisnuita si sa produca de douazeci de ori mai mult lapte. Apoi creezi imagini animate inteligente ale vacii, numite Cowkemon si le promo-vezi la scara globala. COMPANIE GERMANA Ai doua vaci. Le reproiectezi astfel incat sa traiasca 100 de ani, sa manance o data pe luna si sa se mulga singure. COMPANIE BRITANICA Ai doua vaci. Amandoua sunt nebune. COMPANIE ITALIANA Ai doua vaci, dar nu stii unde sunt. Pleci in pauza de pranz. COMPANIE RUSEASCA Ai doua vaci. Le numeri si afli ca ai 5 vaci. Le numeri din nou si afli ca ai 42 de vaci. Le numeri din nou si afli ca ai 12 vaci. Te opresti din numarat vaci si deschizi alta sticla de vodca. COMPANIE ELVETIANA Ai 5000 de vaci, dintre care nici una nu-ti apartine. Facturezi celorlalti cheltuieli de depozitare. COMPANIE INDIANA Ai doua vaci. Te inchini la ele. COMPANIE CHINEZA Ai doua vaci. Ai 300 de oameni care le mulg. Declari somaj zero, productivitate bovina inalta si arestezi reporterul care a publicat cifrele. COMPANIE ROMANEASCA Ai 6 vaci, costuri cat de 10, mulgi doar 3, alergi bezmetic printre ele, mai aduci personal pentru alte 5, dai faliment si dai vina pe bou. __________________ "Adevarul sufera, daca e analizat prea mult".

22 Dec 2004, 02:09	#7
KORBEN Guru Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: deeper underground Posts: 1,428	@jackpot minunata comicaraia m`am stricat dd ras la faza cu italienii si chinezii @jay am plecat din www.radiohead.com din pagina cu celelate situri navigheaza prin ele, in mod sigur gasesti chestii f misto mai ales pe no data, care are un fel d chestionar genial :w00t: __________________ If I was not me, I would hate me too Just like you do I don't need to need you Tell me what to do, tell me what to say

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19 Nov 2004, 23:02	#4
Nae Dead Man Walking Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 1,985	da... am citi si eu acuma... mi-a placut. ...but in fact, do we need souls for ourselves, or is it something to give-away?

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